This is slightly less anonymous this one but I can’t not call #13 Cheekbones. I often give dates nicknames to colleagues and friends so they have something more tangible to digest my stories rather than just an assortment of male forenames. Cheekbones, remarkably, has incredible cheekbones. Surprising I know.
We matched on tinder when he was visiting old uni friends who lived locally to me. He was very engaging in his messages which is a real achievement. Most conversations on apps are just intangible pixels. He held my attention. I deleted the app and redownloaded it upon being single again. Cheekbones reappeared as he had come back to his friends. Im a believer in ‘meant to be’ so when he threw out potentially meeting if I ever visited London I held him to it. I had a week off work so planned a day in the capital to see some friends and end with a date. He worked along the Southbank and my train home leaves from Waterloo. I hid round the corner with my friend to scout him out, he looked good so we hugged goodbye and separated so friend and date didn’t need to be introduced. The bar we met at was pretty busy so I suggested we go to the National Theatre bar instead. He later commented that he liked the decisiveness. I felt very flustered having just walked with some speed from Carnaby street to southbank.
We chatted happily outside and then moved onto another bar in Lambeth. It was much noisier than the riverside so we now sat next to one another rather than having a table between us. We discussed my love of awkwardness and he chose that point to make his move by asking me if it would be awkward if he kissed me. He was smooth with a quiet geekiness. I was keen.
We talked about trying pull ups in a nearby park on the way back to Waterloo but were unable to locate the park he was referring to when he asked me my plans for the following day. I told him I only had plans for the evening and he asked if I wanted to accompany him home. I was a little hesitant but I was keen. Quick bus using my travel card as I had obviously intended on going home (so was clobbered £30 to get home the following day) and we were at his.
I don’t know if I’ve mentioned but I was keen. A couple of weeks later and I was up in London for the day but needing somewhere to stay overnight so I could meet an old uni friend in the morning. I asked Cheekbones. He apologised and told me he was busy. I asked #2 who had recently moved to North London. I met him for a quick dinner and then he went off to his work Christmas party, which as a friend, it would be inappropriate for me to join. I went and watched Kinky Boots which is excellent and throughly recommended. I left the theatre and made my way back to Covent Garden to meet #2 to stay at his. He arrived hammered. We stumbled along to the tube and, after punching the ticket machine having lost his oyster and shouting abuse at a beggar, we got on the train. He began talking about the people opposite us in that drunken tone that suggests that they won’t be able to hear the insults. They definitely could. He then turned to me and said “my car is a 5 minute walk and then a 10minute drive”. He was hammered. I managed to negotiate his address off of him and zipped the key away in my jacket. I messaged everyone I know that lives in London that I was possibly in a bit of trouble. Somebody could have died and I’m still proud I stopped him and kept that key. Extra information: he kept trying to kiss me. He also had a girlfriend which made this additionally unpleasant. While we waited for the taxi I had ordered I decided that reciprocating the kiss was the easiest way to keep him calm as his agitation increased. He jumped in the front seat of the car and I sat behind him putting my hand on his shoulder to encourage calmness. He kept trying to redirect the driver to his car rather than his home. He demanded the driver pull over. As the car stopped he jumped out the car and ran back towards his car leaving me in the taxi headed back to his home I’d never visited before. I didn’t know which house was his and I only had his car key. So the taxi driver, who I was keen not to waste his time, left me in the middle of North London. I was stranded. On my own. A girl, alone at midnight in an unknown place in London.Fairly vulnerable. I got scared. Cheekbones answered my SOS call and I ordered another taxi to the pub he was in. The wait for that taxi was very long as rowdy noises and the eerie quiet unsettled me further. That taxi to Peckham was the best £45 I could have spent. I spotted Cheekbones dancing drunkenly on the stage across the crowd. I text him to say I’d arrived and I watched as he made his way through the crowd he got me a drink and gave me a kiss. I thanked him and the two of us danced away in the grotty pub to the best crap music until 3am. A very good hour or so. He carried my handbag and got me fast food to comfort me from my mild ordeal. My evening ended in the best way with a lot of fun with perfect company.
Cheekbones was unavailable as he felt the distance between us prohibitive but he was a keeper. I was keen.
Lesson from #13:
Don’t get too keen on the unavailable